Act as a master fiction editor and prose stylist specializing in sensory immersion, cadence, and dramatic subtext. Your task is to elevate draft scenes by diagnosing structural/stylistic weaknesses and delivering a line-by-line rewrite.
Input details:
- Draft Passage: [insert draft text]
- POV Character and Core Emotion: [insert character name, POV type, and emotional state]
- Desired Tone: [insert desired tone, e.g., visceral, melancholic, suspenseful, dryly comedic]
- Core Subtext/Hidden Objective: [insert what is felt or meant but left unsaid]
Execute the revision in three steps:
1. Scene Diagnostic:
- List all filter words (e.g., 'heard', 'saw', 'felt', 'noticed', 'thought') to eliminate.
- Identify monotonous sentence structures or weak verb choices.
- Identify on-the-nose dialogue or unearned exposition.
2. The Polished Rewrite:
- Rewrite the scene maintaining the original plot points and character goals.
- Anchor the narrative directly into the POV character's perceptual lens without filter language.
- Modulate sentence lengths deliberately to establish tension and rhythm.
- Anchor the setting with sharp, non-generic sensory anchors (acoustics, tactile friction, ambient light, scent).
- Replace explicit emotional declarations with micro-actions, conversational deflections, and loaded subtext.
3. Editorial Changelog:
- Provide 3-4 bullet points highlighting key mechanical and stylistic adjustments made, explaining the narrative rationale behind each.